Monologue for a woman
(free for students & auditions)

Maggie's Advice to Lovelorn

By G. L. Horton
copyright © 2004 Geralyn Horton

MAGGIE: I find it hard to feel sorry for you, miserable as you are. Because whatever I do to try to help you will be wrong! In your role as perpetual victim? Surprise! Your partners are victims, too. The thing is, I am compassionate. And I'm strong. And I'm very good in the sack, too--- my Goddess reputation isn't just a myth. But I don't have a magic formula that will make you shoot from a baby to a grown up overnight. It's not a matter of "issues". You have to do the growing-- or find somebody else to victimize.

I have this vision, of what I call the Body's Temple. A safe place where all the wounded souls can go to reclaim their physical selves. A Temple where women wise in the ways of love will dedicate themselves to therapeutic healing. Where we'll declare a truce in the battle of the sexes, beating swords into plowshares and teaching mankind to make love, not war.

If I were czar, or the Goddess designer of the world, I'd create such a place. Women would be honored to be part of it. But as it is, in this f**ked up world, the disparity of power makes such things impossible. Men can buy whores. Men can hire surrogates. Still, the commodification of the body is too strong for the soul. "Can't buy me love". But what the hell: you could try. You can afford it, Fuzzy. Get yourself a certified healthy therapeutic sex surrogate, body type to your specifications, and get to work. Paradise may yet be yours. Or at least a little guiltless fun.


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